Fear: Friend or Foe?

Birth is not neat. It is not tidy or always gentle. Birth can be a whirlwind, a storm, a wild collision of breath, sweat, and willpower. It is loud, quiet, and everything in between. And it is beautiful—not in its perfection, but in its unflinching honesty.

When I walk into a birth room with my camera in hand, I’m stepping into the unknown. Each birth is its own story, with its own rhythms, and its own moments of calm and chaos. The mess is part of it, part of the beauty, part of the strength that surfaces when fear is staring you down and you choose to move forward anyway.

Yeah, I said the bad word out loud.

FEAR...

Birth is often painted as an act of fearlessness. We speak about birth empowerment and trusting in the body—there’s a narrative that fear has no place in the birthing room. I completely get it! And yet, as a birth photographer, I’ve never spoken to a mother who didn’t express at least some form of fear, trepidation, or nervousness before giving birth.

Birth is messy. It’s raw, untamed, full of moments that don’t fit neatly into our ideas of what it should be. It’s the kind of experience that demands everything, leaving no space for pretense or perfection. But in the middle of that beautiful chaos, there is a quiet force driving it all forward.

It’s fear.

Not the kind of fear that holds you back, or makes you question your strength. No—this is the kind of fear that calls you to the edge of the unknown and whispers, go on, keep going. It’s a fear that doesn’t ask you to retreat, but to step forward, to move through it.

When I step into a birth room with my camera, I feel it in the air—a trembling anticipation, a quiet hum of uncertainty, but it’s not hesitation. It’s the kind of fear that says, I don’t know what’s ahead, but I am going there anyway.

Fear That Moves You Forward

In the eyes of a mother deep in labor, there is always a flicker of this fear. Not a fear of failing, but of crossing into something greater than herself. It’s a threshold, and every contraction, every breath, is another step closer to crossing that line. Fear doesn’t stop her; it is what pushes her forward.

Birth is a journey through fear. A fear that sharpens your focus, that makes you breathe deeper, hold tighter, push harder. It’s the fear of stepping into the unknown, but knowing that you’re not stepping back. Fear, in these moments, is not an enemy. It’s a companion. It walks alongside the strength, alongside the courage. It doesn’t fight against you—it moves with you. It’s a force that transforms doubt into action, and it guides you, steady and unrelenting, through the pain and into the moment where life is born.

Courage Wrapped in Fear

If birth wasn't scary—if there wasn't that edge of fear to push through—then what would make it such a powerful act of courage? It’s that very fear, that leap into the unknown, that reveals the strength of a mother. Courage doesn’t exist without fear. To remove fear from the experience of birth is to remove the mother’s triumph, her victory over the unknown.

The courage I see in birth is not the absence of fear—it is fear, carried gracefully. It is the mother who cries out in pain but finds her breath in the same moment. It is the father who grips her hand, not with certainty but with faith. It’s in the silence between contractions when everyone in the room knows that the next wave will come, and with it, the moment of truth.

Fear is woven into every second of that journey. But it doesn’t hold anyone back. It moves them. It’s not the kind of fear that asks you to question your strength; it’s the kind that tells you, this is why you are strong.

There’s a stillness that comes in the middle of labor, a quiet lull where the world seems to hold its breath. It’s not the absence of fear—it’s the calm that comes when you’ve accepted that fear will be there, and you move forward anyway. In that calm, there is power.

The Fear That Creates Life

Fear and life go hand in hand. Every new life enters this world on the edge of fear, not in spite of it, but because of it. The fear is part of the process. As a photographer, I’m not just capturing the soft, serene moments after birth; I’m capturing one of a woman's greatest triumphs. It’s in a mama’s eyes as she breathes through the pain, the way her body fights and yields at the same time. And a father’s steady hand on her back, their shared determination to press on. And then, in the middle of that mess, that fear, that struggle—there is a baby’s cry. It is the sound of life breaking through, not in the absence of fear, but because fear was present all along, urging everyone to keep going.

Embracing Fear as Part of the Journey

When I deliver these images to families, I hope they see more than just the sweet moments after the baby arrives. I hope they see the courage and determination that shaped those moments—the good kind of fear.

Birth is messy. And yes, it's scarry! But not the kind of scary that makes you step back. It is fear that leads you to the edge and makes you brave enough to keep walking.

It is the messy, beautiful truth of birth—that life is born not in the absence of fear, but because of it. That fear is not a weakness, it is the fire that forges strength, turning every mother into a warrior —one who faces the unknown, rises through the pain, and brings new life into this world with fierce, unstoppable love.